Jessica Alba just recently had a baby and usually when a celebrity has a
kid their body goes back to exactly what it was before. Thin. But that is
usually because they can afford the best personal trainers in Hollywood
and eat whatever the fuck their dietician tells them to. Not Alba. She
tells Elle magazine that her secret to looking so good on the red carpet
after her baby was a girdle. What a lazy bitch. She goes on to tell the
magazine just how lazy she was. She says, " [The workouts] were
horrible. I cried. And I haven't worked out since." She is also not too
jazzed about being away from her new born baby. No word on what
movie she is actually working on, but the producers and the huge
paycheck take a back seat to being amother. You see, this is why I am
not a father. If I was a father but also a movie star, I would be talking
the shit out of the movie I was working on and just how rich I was getting
because of it. "Oh and the kid? He is at home right now. Probably pooping."
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